Love Letters

We are living in a virtual time of emails, text messages, facebook posts etc, it seems that days of hand written love letters received by snail mail are long gone.

I find it sad that my daughter may never experience the feeling of waiting for the postman to arrive and drop a letter into her mail box from the boy that she loves.  The feeling of  zipping through the envelopes until you find that one letter addressed to you where you recognise the handwriting, knowing that this letter is filled with words written just for you.  Then you open it unfold the pages and every word, every letter describes to you exactly how that person felt at that very moment and each line takes your breath away.  Then you read each word again and again and unlike a virtual letter which you just click to close, a hand written letter you carefully fold it up and slide it back into the envelope, a hand written letter is forever real.  Some people may place the letter under their pillow or put it safely away in a box where they keep all their special things.  For those who’s loved ones are far away, maybe they are working away from home or they are fighting a war or they are just two people who live continents away from each other,  that one love letter is their only connection.   A hand written letter is full of feelings and emotions that has been recorded in ink, a letter which is opened a thousand times that the little folds of the letter are so delicate that if not opened carefully the letter may tear. 

Techonolgy is great but I feel that it is stealing little life experiences that shouldn’t be missed and I think sometimes people need to slow down and remember how it feels to live “real life”  The new generation will probably never experience the art of writing a hand written letter themselves, it has now all been replaced  by text lingo and emoticons!

Our Mal

When I was 8 years old, Mal became a part of my life and now he is gone.  A person goes through life never knowing how long someone will be there, you just assume it will be forever.  One of the worst feelings is hearing the phone ring late at night and you know it can only be bad news on the other side.  I was frozen when my Mom told me that Mal had died, I knew he wasn’t well, and with this knowledge you always kind of prepare yourself for the bad news call, then when you hear the news, everything about that person becomes so final and you start thinking about what you still wanted to say or what you still wanted to ask them.  Macolm was a good man, a hard worker and good provider and I am so proud that I got to spend most of my life so far with him in it.  Thank you Mal for being in my life and for loving me and all of us like you did.  We will all miss you very much and you will never be forgotten.

Love always x

8 today

It’s my babys birthday today, she turned eight years old! 

 That is 2920 days most of which I have spent with her, that is a lot of time and stax of good memories, I wouldn’t want to imagine a single day with out her. 

I couldn’t have wished for a more perfect girl to be my daughter and thank you for being a part of my life.

Mommy loves you big girl!

In my daughters eyes

In my daughter’s eyes – Martina McBride 

In my daughter’s eyes I am a hero
I am strong and wise and I know no fear
But the truth is plain to see
She was sent to rescue me
I see who I wanna be
In my daughter’s eyes

In my daughter’s eyes everyone is equal
Darkness turns to light and the
world is at peace
This miracle God gave to me gives me
strength when I am weak
I find reason to believe
In my daughter’s eyes

And when she wraps her hand
around my finger
Oh it puts a smile in my heart
Everything becomes a little clearer
I realize what life is all about

It’s hangin’ on when your heart
has had enough
It’s giving more when you feel like giving up
I’ve seen the light
It’s in my daughter’s eyes

In my daughter’s eyes I can see the future
A reflection of who I am and what will be
Though she’ll grow and someday leave
Maybe raise a family
When I’m gone I hope you see how happy
she made me
For I’ll be there
In my daughter’s eyes

Back in Heidi land

I did it! I managed to go back to South Africa and come home safe and sound, there was no one waiting for me at customs to arrest me and returning back to Austria was no problem at all, seems all that freaking out and panic attacking was all for nothing.

It was really great being back for a visit, totally awesome seeing my Mom and sisters and the rest of the family, so happy to see good friends and the food was just so yummy.

It just sucked that the time there was so short, it flew by and I didn’t get a chance to see more than half of the people I wanted to see and do half the stuff I wanted to do, but that’s ok, there is always next time. 

The worst part about visiting is that eventually you have to say goodbye and that sucks, I miss everyone so much already, I missed them the second that I left, it is so cool that we can still all communicate via the web and of course the telephone, all I need now is my very own Blackberry!

I am so thankful for the friends and family that I have, you are all the sunshine in my life and help make it a beautiful day, love you lots and lots and miss you so much xoxoxoxo

Take it back

If I had a time travel machine and could go back to the past would I change anything? 

I use to think, No, I would never change anything in my life because everything that has happend in my life, good or bad is what makes me the person that I am today.  Any mistakes made are good because they are life lessons, I have learn’t from them, right?

Well, I think it’s rubbish, I think we say stuff like that to make ourselves feel better about any failures that we have had, if I could go back I would definately undo every stupid thing that I have ever done or said and only keep the good.  We are all taught morals and values, what is good or bad, who is nice or mean and what is fake or real, it is just unfortunate that we are stupid enough to trust people or believe the choices that we make are the right ones just because something  looks shiny and sparkly.

If I could there are so many decisions and choices that I would change, so many things that I would never say and so much more that I would do.

The reality is there is no time machine, what’s done is done and the past can never be changed, but there is still today and tomorrow all I can do is try and be the best that I can be and make choices that I can be proud of.

Madonna

When I was about 8 years old my sisters friend came to the house, she brought a cassette tape for us to listen to, it was the Madonna True Blue album, from that moment, I was in love with Madonna.  I got to keep that tape which I played over and over and sang out loud into my brush wanabe microphone as I performed like a pop star in front of the mirror.  Eventually the tape stretched and it was never the same after that, but my love for Madonna has never been lost.  When I was younger the walls of my bedroom were covered with poster of Madonna, she was like the coolest pop star ever, I loved the way she looked, the way she dressed, the way she danced and I knew every single word to every single song.  She has  never been just ordinary, she is forever changing her look, shocking the public and making more music to love.  She built herself up from the very bottom, she had a dream and now has it all.

Forever your fan

U2

U2 is another one of those legendary bands that have been around forever.  The boys Bono, The Edge, Adam Clayton and Larry Mullen Jr. are all from Dublin, nothing nicer than an Irish accent, when I was still pint size I would have done anything for a kiss from the yummy drummer, anyways, focus Angie! 

Right, so they all attended the same High School and this is where they formed U2.

They have released 13 studio albums, won a zillion Awards for a stack of things. They have always been very involved in giving back by being a part of numerous campaigns to make our world a better place. 

 I am always proud of bands like U2, with all the fame and fortune, they never forget the little people.

Keep helping to make it a beautiful day for us guys, you boys Rock!

Freddie Mercury

in 1971 four guys hooked up and created a band which I say is one of the most legendary bands of our time called Queen.  Over the next few years they gained world wide fame.  Their first album released was called Queen which was later followed by Queen II with another 12 albums to follow after that.  The lead singer of the band was called Freddie Mercury, he was born in Zanzibar and learned to play the piano at the age of 7.  In the mid 80′s Freddie began to focus alot more on his solo career, on the 23rd of November 1991 he let the public know he had been diagnosed with Aids, sadly he died 24 hrs later of bronchopneumonia.

He is a legend.   He was a singer, a songwriter, an instrumentalist and a great performer who filled the hearts of millions of people and is still missed very much to this day.  He had one of the most powerful  voices I have ever heard, the kind that gives you goose bumps, unforgetable.  Fans didn’t know it at the time, but now when you listen to the words of some of his songs, he knew he was dying and saying goodbye.

few of my favourites :

Who am I?

How often have you been asked the question, tell me about yourself?

This is not always an easy question to answer, I mean, how does one define oneself into words?

Right, so who am I?

I am Angelique, mostly referred to as Angie or Ang, growing up I hated my name, I wondered why couldn’t I have a simple short name like Julie or just Ang, there are very few people that call me by my full name nowdays, but now that I am older, I quite like the sound of Angelique.

I love taking photos, I believe that ones memory will fade or die, but a photo and its memory will live forever, it’s timeless.  I try to capture the exact moment in every picture so it speaks for itself. 

I am a people person, I love meeting someone new and learning everything about them, likes and dislikes, their dreams, I love catching up with the people that I already know.  I am very good with people and like to think that they love me for who I am, I like to make others happy and feel good about themselves, I like knowing that I am someone that can be counted on and can turn a frown upside down into a smile. 

I love the sound of rain drops and thunderstorms and I love walking in soft summer rain.  I love laying on the ground looking up at the clouds and hearing the wind rustling through the trees.  I love almost all animals small, big, fluffy, smooth or spiky all round, spiders and parktown prawns are not my friends!

I love all kinds of music old and new, I love the sound of a piano melody or an acoustic guitar, I love songs and melodies that have emotion and passion, something that touches my soul, something I can feel.

I try and be strong and full of confidence, but I guess every now and then I fail and feel a little down, but then I know everything will be fine and I am thankful for my life.

I am a wife and mother, I try my very best to be the best that I can be, I may not be perfect but I hope that my best is good enough for them.

I love the sound of laughter, you know, the kind that comes from deep down inside ones tummy, or the sound of a spontaneous contageous laugh.

I Love the way my mother strokes my hair when I am glum and calls me Ba and makes me feel like everything will be ok.  I love being told real stories about my life and my family, I wish it could all be writen down in a big book so I can remember every moment forever and pass them on.

I love all things sparkly picked specially for me, I love shopping, I believe we can never have enough pretty things to wear or shoes.  I like having pretty toenails and french manicured nails.  I think it’s important to look pretty but none of that means anything if ur ugly on the inside.

I can be very short tempered and emotional at times, I hate fakeness and bullshit and hate being played, my mouth can react faster than my brain can think, when I am wrong or realise I have said hurtful things, I will always say sorry.  I can be stubborn and unforgiving.

I guess everyone wants to belong and be loved in this world, to make a difference to others and to just try and be a good person, I hope I am and I do.